There are certain moments or feelings that, being a blissfully married millionaire, go unexplored in my life. Sometimes I have to play little games with myself, like throwing baseballs through my imported windows or not paying my bills until the electricity gets shut off.
"Oh, don't use that bathroom, honey, I seem to have shot the toilet to bits!
...
Want to go down to the hardware store with me and help me pick out a new one?"
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